Today’s prompt is: Embarrassing
I mean, there’s a million places to go with this word. What I would absolutely love to do is share with you an embarrassing story of mine, but I’m one of those people whose mind goes entirely blank when I try to think of something directly!
Other than the classic, waving at people and realising you don’t know them, or getting completely the wrong end of the stick, I can’t really think of any. Oh, although I did come in early when saying my vows; I was obviously very keen as I said ‘I will’ before the ‘Forever and ever’ – oops!
I’m okay with that though. That’s the strange thing about embarrassment; it’s only really embarrassing if you let it be. Sure, other people can be embarrassed for you, but if it doesn’t really affect you, was it embarrassing? Okay I think I’ve now officially written ’embarrassment’ more times in a paragraph than I have in my life, but we’re getting there.
It’s interesting as well how there are different kinds of embarrassment. There’s the type that become a funny story after time, that no longer affect you. Then there’s the type that everyone knows never to speak about again unless the person it affects brings it up. Maybe they’re both the same, I don’t know. Maybe those stories we end up being able to laugh about affect us just as much as the big things we don’t speak about, but sometimes we just have to grin and bear it?
When your identity is based on what others think of you – which, let’s be honest, sneaks into every single one of ours lives – these moments of embarrassment become controlling. I think we’re only ever free of them when our identity is no longer in them, or they’re from so long ago that they’re almost about a person that we don’t even know any more.
I’m not sure if that makes any sense, but I’m here to process, to get back into writing, and to improve on how I write. If you made it this far, congratulations and thank you.